Me and my Poop theory

I am in a self-loathing mood, again. I shouldn't be like this but I still am. Oh wow! An english post, I promise I will be careful with my grammar. PROMISE! If you're wondering why I am posting this way, it's because of the original J-Z.

Back to business. I think it started right after STD practice. I was horrible during practice I couldn't properly get the steps. Which was really weird, because I was taught only about4 eights during that time, a relatively(here's an assignment, post a smiley everytime you read the word "relative[ly]") small number if you consider the fact that during practice we usually learn about 10-12 eights. Maybe it's because we haven't practiced for about two weeks so my brain went on vacation and I need to summon it and that could take a while.

During these moods, I feel so inferior. I feel so useless. My work is crappy, or so I believe, and should be thrown away with my useless body into an incinerator and the ashes should be donated to the junkless junkies in rehab to help them recover. Did you get that? In summary, I feel like crap. What is the cause of all of this? I do not rightfully know. It just happens. I just ride it out hopefully I will get past it (and I usually do, it justs comes back once in a while). Don't worry, I do not feel suicidal, yet. I need a shrink. I just realized something. I have a kind of depression. I think we discussed it in Soc Sci, I forgot the name but the symptoms are the same, I'll check. Maybe that is why I am not gaining any weight. My friend is right, "it's all psychological." You should use that clause as a motto, everytime you fail something say "it's all psychological," everytime somebody needs comforting say "it's all psychological," if you feel sick say "it's all psychological." It seems escapist but in some situations it'll make you laugh. I know I have. Imagine saying that to a friend who failed in a math17 dep. *snort*

During these times it is comforting to talk to myself. Too bad I haven't bought a recorder yet so I haven't recorded my voice and with my memory so weak as it is all the fun stuff we talk about gets lost in my spit. It helps. It's like keepinga journal only the only physical evidence is saliva and maybe uber-tiny cracks on the wall formed by my voice (here's a weird fact, sharapova's scream is about 100 or so decibels the same as the sound of a plane landing or taking off). I usually do it in the bathroom or in my room, actually any place would do just as long only I would hear myself. The second floor of our house is usually my domain and I sometimes do it there, I also do it in my lolo's clinic at night(creepy huh?).

Before I decided to post today I was actually conversing with myself in the bathroom. That is howI developed my poop theory. Bathrooms are the best place in the house to do stuff a non-exhibitionist wouldn't normally do outside or in front of people. You could poop, pee and paint. You could sing and it actually sounds good(that is if your bathroom is tiled). You could talk to yourself and nobody would care because they would think you are just singing or the sounds would be garbled by the tap. You could do almost anything you want. It's nice. Just make sure you do not slip and hit your head and kill yourself or worse, be a vegetable.

Back to the theory. Ancient man's bathroom was everywhere and anywhere. If you want to go, then go. And they lived like animals with no culture or technology. Then they started "going" in more private places, maybe behind a treeor a bush. They started hiding this very natural act. Soon enough they think why not cover my genitals. And maybe use a plate, and spoon. And build my own house. Or invent something that would protect me. They became humans and, more importantly, sanitary. Catch my drift? This goes with the Biblical theory (It seems most of my theories have roots in the Bible. Where are my other theories? Secret.). Remember the story of Adam and Eve?

Speaking of the Bible. I should go. I haven't attended church in a long while. Maybe a religious event will stop this thing.