I didn't know that this was a cover of Depeche mode song.  Must now rethink my judgement of Depeche mode

Urbandub - Home


Depeche mode - Home

. I think the cover has a richer, darker yet more hopeful sound than the original. Yes, this is how I spend the 4 days of "sembreak."

This and browsing graduate school websites. On one hand, I have a goal and I'm laying out my plans. On the other, I think I'm so obsessed with getting out of med school and going to real grad school that I find it relaxing to browse through curricula, funding mechanisms and student profiles. Realistically speaking though I would probably need to work at least 3 years after med school before I even become good enough for grad school and have a fighting chance to get a full scholarship.

 

Studying medicine is really about learning how to communicate. It could be with fellow doctors, allied health professions or our cherished patients. I feel that the difference between a great doctor and an average one is determined by his or her ability to communicate his or her thoughts to the intended audience. It is imperative that doctors have a good grasp of the dominant language or languages in the their area of practice or in, UPCM lingo, community whether it be Filipino, English, Bisaya or swardspeak.

Unfortunately, UP students have lived very sheltered lives within the confines of the university. Although we know Filipino, we do not have a good grasp of the Filipino being used outside academic circles. For example, multiple classmates were shocked that the term for masturbation is Mariang-palad. And yet, still many do not feel the need for our community exposures. Compound this with our still rudimentary grasp of med-speak and the variations that occur for each hospital and each department.

---
Again, in retrospect, I should have been more attentive participative eager during Filipino and English class. I still regret not being able to gain a good grasp of effective communication, in writing and in speech, much earlier in my education. I've always told myself that writing and public speaking is not my thing. Someone should have told me that these two things are the vitals things a doctor should have in his or her arsenal.

committed my first blooper for the 2nd sem* even before it started. It seems that I would have a very full day on November 12. Must start taking in more calories. Of course, my new-ish friend tells me that I should say carbs or fat instead of calories.

* - technically, we don't have a 1st or 2nd sem in ICC I year. I'm just considering Nov 7, the day of our enrollment as the 1st day of 2nd sem.

just when I was in the mood to post pictures, my PC starts acting up. this sucks...

at least the suspects were quickly identified and nabbed unlike in multiple other murder or disappearance cases.

Gah! This is not a good day. Survey woes... I'll just have to assess and plan on Monday.

---
I'm itching to do procedures yet I really won't need any of those skills in the future. I guess it's just that desire to prove myself. I should really get my priorities straightened out.

---
Really, why this urge when I know that I'll be suffering through those very procedures next year?

---
And that my friends is called rationalization.

---
Everyone is talking about their summer electives. I've long given up hope on finding a really good research elective abroad so it's PGH for me. I've decided that an RA position looks better on the CV. There will be much more learning and best of all, I get paid. Still, I must brace myself for the deluge of elective-related fb posts and pictures this coming summer and the jealousy I will probably feel. Money money money sounds like a good chant.

---
I resolve to discuss salary with my future boss. Getting the minimum wage is not fair given what I can now offer.

---
Insults and snark comments. I guess it's better that I take it all instead of some poor sap. It's better for the group dynamics. And other blocks wonder why we function so well. I do fear that one day I'll explode and utterly destroy someone.

ICC year has been good so far. Stress levels are manageable and spike up only when I have pressing extra-curricular activities. I have ample amount of time to study and relax. My motivation to study is so I could perform a good interview and assessment of the patient and not because I would do poorly in a written exam. Very much unlike LU4. It's helpful that the consultants are very supportive and tolerant of our relative lack of knowledge.

---
I also view this year as my year of redemption from ignorance of basic anatomy and disappearing knowledge of physiology and biochemistry. Finally, those anatomical landmarks are put into useful context and I wouldn't have to rely on rote memorization.

---
Last week, I had another CEA worthy experience. CEA is a tool primarily utilized by Family Medicine specialists to handle psychosocial concerns of patients. CEA is an abbreviation of Catharsis, Education and Action. It works on the theory that talking about a problem helps solve it. I wasn't a great believer of this tool but the universe wants me to convert me and has put me into CEA patient encounters. Ironically, it is not during those sessions where we were expected to utilize CEA. The first one was during our musculoskeletal module in LU4 (2nd year) involving a patient with a fracture needing surgery. She's greatly troubled by her finances. I was interviewing her alone when she suddenly started crying. Hence, C of the CEA.

This time I was interviewing a patient again on my own as my groupmates were talking to the bantay. I was having a hard time getting a good history of the patient as she keeps going on about how she has no money, how she doesn't know why she needs another surgery and her desire to go home. I guess I should have read the  clues and started CEA but I have little time so I pushed for the obtaining the "pertinent" history. A seemingly innocuous question from her daughter whether she really wants the surgery or not opened a dam of emotions which frankly overwhelmed the shit out of me and my classmate (who was really an innocent bystander). Apparently, she feels abandoned by her family, fears that she will lose sight from her remaining good eye and feels betrayed by the PGH. I was put in a tight spot, I know that I can address at least one of her issues and allay her fear of becoming blind but I am not comfortable in interfering with the management of a patient who is not mine. In the end, I think she really did went home untreated and it's sad that her remaining years will be full of pain, anger and suffering.