I'm getting grade-conscious again. It is not a bad thing in itself since students should really be conscious of their grades because it is somewhat a good measure if you are learning something or not. It is the ultra-competitive/every-one-is-my-enemy attitude that is bad. I've somehow learned to control it in high school and I wasn't really aiming for anything high during that time, I was happy to land any where but this time it's different.

I guess I should remember that my only competition is myself. As crappy and cliche as it is, it is true especially with the grading system of my school. I've decided way back that getting a grade of 2.0 and higher(meaning 2.25, 3, etc) is bad since it means I learned and mastered only 80%(or less) of the subject matter or at the very least, it will be perceived that way. The real reasons why I took the final exam in Chem 31 because I feel that I should test my true knowledge in Organic Chemistry and really get the grade I feel I truly deserve.

The point is this week I'm getting annoyed by the grades of other people and have begun monitoring the grades of other people as well. Why the fuck should I care if other people get higher grades than I do?! Based on my philosophy, I shouldn't , right? But I am caring and it really sucks. I guess it is the just end of the semester jitters because everybody is able to and computing their grades already. And if I want this to stop, I just have to will it to stop.

-------
Happy Banned Books Week Everybody! Too bad I'm stuck with the textbooks for this week(and the next one) so I'd probably not be able to join the uh... festivities.