finally got to see my grades. surprisingly, I got lower grades at the subject I thought I did well at and my decent grades for subjects I felt I really sucked at.

Rationalizing this experience, I shouldn't care that I probably won't get an MD with honors. I won't be going to residency where grades still matter. But I don't really know what scholarship committees look for and having good grades wouldn't hurt, right? And I'm losing my chance of giving a good graduation gift to my parents.

Cynthia explains why and sings Blackbird cover [HD]

Safe journey Cynthia Alexander. Thank you for the music.

I hope I can catch you live someday.

One down.

Mostly happy that I started with a rotation that allowed me to work out the twisted system of PGH. But also happy that I return to clinical work in a rotation that values a good and through history and physical exam. I'm already lazy as it is.

I'm also fairly sure that a resident's life is not for me. Weekends are that important apparently.

So I suddenly thought of how my own house would look like. I'm not even sure if I'd have enough money to have my own house built. My generous parents have bought some land but the rest is up to me. The easiest to build in my mind was the kitchen/dining room which would have to be adequately equipped and stocked for my forays into the culinary arts. I'm pretty sure I want my house to be have two floors. It would allow lots of light to enter and would have good ventilation. At the entrance, it would have a space to remove and store shoes like how those areas the Japanese have. I'm sure I want my bedroom to be on the first floor. I think I'll keep the living room pretty open and sparse. The second floor would have the guest room, the study and again more open space for whatever hobbies I might have in the future. The space would probably be my default reading area. I'd have a wall with lots of books and comfy chairs. The study would be my home office. It would have my other books, a decent computer and a printer that doesn't suck. Wooden floors seems nice. Tiles would be easier to clean though. Oh yeah. I'd have my child's room in the 2nd floor. I plan to deprive him or her of computer games until he or she gains a strong reading habit.

Okay. Stop dreaming and get back to studying.

okay. I'm not yet in my study-or-die mode.

This day sucks. My stethoscope is missing. I seem to have misplaced my penlight. I have two relatively weird patients.My lunch was too expensive and the vegetables didn't taste right. The weather is hot and humid. It took a very long time to enter the LRT station. A classmate accidentally spilled coffee over my laptop rendering its keyboard useless. The BSFs need to be resampled for the nth time. An issue I thought had resolved seems to be rearing its ugly head again.

Fortunately, I have made a back-up of important reference materials in my USB, all the BSF files are in my Dropbox, my classmate in his guilt would pay for the repairs, my friend made onigiri and gave me two, I don't have duty this week and this ugly head will not be seen much due to clerkship.

Clerkship starts tomorrow.

 Our block is lucky that we won't be experiencing the worst version of "shifting dullness" since we'd be starting with Rehab med. Unfortunately, this specialty demands a more comprehensive history and physical exam with the addition of ROM measurements, functional history, special MSK tests and, if you're unlucky, a psychiatric history. At least there won't be patients to monitor.

I feel the urge to accomplish the things that need to be done but I'm to lazy to do it.

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I like solving problems. Problem is when I know how to solve it or at least have the conceptual framework down, I stop. That's why I think I work best in groups.

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Listing down things helps keep the brain calm. Makes me think that I have at least accomplished something.

So that's the buzz of alcohol. Maybe I should have drunk another glass.

Knee itches though.

it seems that I haven't posted any pictures for quite a while now...

I should fix that.

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My tutee got a score below passing for her finals but she still passed the subject. *sigh of relief* One hour is just not enough to cover a semester's worth of topics. *sigh*

my fingers hurt. the sampling frame is nearly complete. damn hospitals with non-functional phones.

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I dread the day that this will happen to me.

on one hand, I get money. on the other hand, it means she is in danger of failing the subject. *sigh*

and I still need to brush up on molecular orbital theory.

thank you hard working government officials. I just hope we have a better information system in place so we'd have an updated database of all things important regarding our health care system.

These government records are giving me a headache.

Beach finally...  Can't beat the feeling of mildly burnt skin and sore arms.

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Just  a thought. Whenever I share to some MD that I don't plan to be a clinician (in the sense that it won't be my main source of income) and shudder at the thought of spending the rest of my youth in a hospital, they warn that I shouldn't be surprise if this outlook changes after clerkship. One advised me to not be too set on my goals of practicing in public health. I wonder if they would ever say this if I say that I dream of becoming a super specialist instead of becoming a research or a public health person. I wouldn't be surprised if they replied, "Good for you. Be sure to go to hospital X for training."

Small ways the system discouraging non-clinician careers for MDs. hmmm...

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Based on my fb feed, the outside world (e.g. the corporate world) still has a lots of extra-curricular *ehem* activities outside of your job description. Mental note to self, remove dancing under skills and the dance orgs in org affiliations. Must avoid becoming the resident choreographer/performer for any organization I join in the future. Unless I'd be working with people with uber dance skills.

one less book off my summer reading list. I'm excited for the Last Battle but I really don't want to read it from Rand's POV. I don't know why I hate the main protagonist in this entire series but I do.

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Boss is imposing a five day week for our research team. Goodbye 3-day weekends! I'm sad to see you go but... this also means that goodbye to 10-hour workday! Good riddance!

And it looks like he's serious about us calling all of those BSFs by June.

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 Better get started on the novel mentor wants us to read. Finally going to read a "general" fiction book after years of fantasy and sci-fi and manga.

turns out our universe and sampling frame is off. not by some ten facilities but a little less than 400 facilities. damn. And boss still wants us to call all those facilities. It took us three weeks to call 275 facilities. It's annoying because the agency which commissioned this work should have given us this information months ago or corrected us that the universe is not just 300 facilities. Getting the sampling frame wrong is such a rookie mistake. damn it. I should have known better. But no use crying over spilled milk. We just need to move forward.

But I do hope that we won't need to call all those other facilities. Can we just call those facilities that have missing information? If the local departments can provide us with complete information enough to perform sampling then we just call the facilities that are included in the sample. We can call all the other facilities but it shouldn't delay the data collection.

Besides we still need to do a whole lot of stuff. Whoever can  give a suitable Filipino translation of the phrase "model the cost-effectiveness" gets a Magnum bar.

Diagnostic kits and technology is a big field of research. Name a disease and you'd find lots of laboratories working on different ways to diagnose it either through the use of clinical data, serology, nucleic acid technology and lots more. In the past hour, I've read about ultrasensitive biosensors, a game that can diagnose malaria and a urine-based malaria diagnostic test. I seem to recall some people creating a mobile phone app that "diagnoses" dengue (it doesn't. It just determines platelet concentrations).

It's nice to hear people innovate and try out new stuff. New stuff is good. New stuff leads to breakthroughs and revolutions. Coming from a community background though, I can't help wonder if creating new health technology is worth it. Wouldn't it be better to invest in old but proven solutions? The addage "If it's not broken, don't fix it." comes to mind.

For example, microscopy maybe the oldest method in the book but it doesn't mean that we should stop using it. Besides, technology is expensive. Between a diagnostic kit that can diagnose only one disease and a microscope (plus training of a microscopist) that can be used for lots of things, I'd invest on the microscope.

Or maybe I'm just being a Luddite.

I'm responsible for editing and finishing up the study tool. The Universe continues to find ways for me to appreciate my degree in public health.

Hey! I've played a role in the design of study tools for two national studies. I still have room for improvement though. I tend to design more for data encoders rather than data collectors. I also need to work on making study tools pretty. Pretty study tools make the job of data collecting less of a burden.

On a side note, aside from those who chose to go to med school, no one in our BSPH batch is unemployed.

I'm working for two research projects called Twilight and Eclipse. It's about blood banks (our technical term is Blood service facility). Get it?